I was working my way around my Entrecard drops inbox and came across a blog that I hadn't remembered visiting before called "Life's sweets and spices" and the latest post was titled "Childhood stress" and as I always try to read at least one entry when I'm dropping Entrecards I decided to give it a read and it reminded me of a very important lesson that I learned quite early on in my life but as I have got older it's a lesson that I often forget.

Do not judge others until you have walked in their shoes

When I was young I quickly progressed from a junior office person to a technical supervisor and my colleagues at the time would frequently comment on the salaries of others in similar positions to mine. My wage had never quite caught up with my position and it was clear that others in similar roles were earning 4 to 5 times more than myself but it wasn't a problem for me. The thing I concentrated on was whether I was earning a fair wage and as I was still very young I was quite happy and as far as I knew the people earning more done so because they deserved it. OK, maybe I was a bit naive at the time but my thinking was actually very healthy and my next pay raise although generous in terms of a percentage raise didn't go as far as I had hoped so I took a week off work and went for some interviews and was offered 3 of them. The next day I asked to speak to my manager and explained to him that I really enjoyed my job and although pleased to have received a pay raise it didn't seem to be anywhere near the market rate. I then went on to explain that I have been offered three jobs at other companies with equivalent roles and much larger salaries and told him that I was quite sad that I felt I was going to have to leave because the opportunity to earn more money was too great to ignore.I was very lucky to have a really good manager and he said give me an hour and I will see what I can do. Half an hour later he called me in to his office and explained that he had spoken to HR and they had agreed to double my salary!!! Wow! That was far better than I had expected and I agreed to stay at the company. Now, I am telling you this story in such detail because I feel very proud of achieving what I had in such a short time but also because after the pay rise came greater responsibilities and I began to understand what it was like to walk in the shoes of those who earnt similar money and it wasn't easy. I was right to concentrate on whether my own salary was fair for me and not worry about whether someone elses salary was fair but I wonder now if because of my young age I might have actually benefited from staying at a lower salary for longer and gradually increased my salary and responsibilities rather than burning out in my mid 20's.

So, next time I find myself judging others I will try to remember this story and try not to be so judgemental. After all, it is not possible for me to understand the other persons position without first walking n their shoes.